We are back with another what about worry? And today we get into a discussion with Madison Rene. As always,m if you want to support what I do even more, hit the subscribe button below. Let’s get into this.
Hello. Are you happy to share your name, and would you like to share anything about yourself?
Of course, my name is Madison Rene', but typically, I go by Sincerelybluejay. I am a poet and barista suffering from the most severe case of life. Okay, but seriously, I've never been diagnosed with anything, but I've had my fair share of big emotions and hard moments - stress and anxiety from everyday living.
I feel like everybody suffers from a little anxiety, which is what prompted this series, so I want to ask, how much of a part does anxiety play in your life?
So I feel like, in one regard, I was incredibly lucky I had an incredible mother who always taught me art and community and would help me wherever I was going through something. So, I've always gone to poetry, art, museums, and other people when I felt anxious or anything else, and then it became a part of my routine and day-to-day life. But on the other, something happened in my life at the end of last year, and my routine changed completely - it was at that time that I realized just how anxious I really am. Does that answer the question?
I feel like the beauty of this series is that everybody seems to veer off slightly, but they always manage to answer the question. Side tangents are welcome. From what you said, are you a heavily routined person?
There are things I do more or less every day or every week, but I also leave myself time to explore and follow my heart/instincts/inspiration.
What would you say the effects of anxiety are for you?
Physical discomfort is the most noticeable: my chest gets tight, and my breathing is more difficult. Also, I lose a lot of sleep to anxiety as well. Spending so much time either looking for solutions or getting carried away with all the things that could be outcomes of whatever induced the anxiety
The less sleep we get, the harder it is, but it doesn’t let us sleep. It’s a very cruel cycle. What have you found helps you deal with anxiety?
So, going back to what I said about my mother, she did a really great job of encouraging me to follow my passions for art and a better world. I read some of my favorite poetry, and I call my friends. I go to museums and see what others did with their worries and fears and all those other big emotions. And, of course, I write poetry myself.
Do you have a favourite museum or a museum bucket list?
Oh yes, to both. I really love the Norton Art Gallery in Shreveport, Louisiana. And even though it's not known worldwide or making waves, I love how there's something for everyone. A room full of first edition and rare books, a series of gardens with our door art, interactive art for kids, local and historical art, and honestly just so much, and it flows beautifully and is always a joy to me. And the bucket list is so long, but I'm chipping away at it little by little.
I think you could put anything in a museum and it would immediately become more interesting. I’d see anything in a museum, so I totally understand the appeal. I know you’re big on community and doing writing marathons for twenty-four hours and beyond. Do those events calm you or have any effect on your anxiety?
I'm thrilled you asked this because I get versions of it all the time! I am a little anxious leading up to them because I'm always afraid I don't have enough content lined up or about what I'm going to do to motivate myself between like 3-6 am when no one is really in the audience. But during and after, I'm always calm and amazed at what an incredible community I have and what we're able to do for the world when we come together.
It is a lot of content to create, but it is truly beautiful that you do that. I think art gets such a good image for being calming, but there are parts of it that are anxiety-inducing. Focussing on the calming, do you have any books you return to for calming effect?
Oh, absolutely one of my go-to’s, and I shout this out everywhere, is ‘I Wrote This For You’ by Iain s. Thomas. But I also go to a collection of E. E. Cummings works as well, and depending on what caused the anxiety, I also find a lot of comfort in Emily Dickinson's work.
There is a calming element to their style, sure! Do you have any advice for anybody struggling with anxiety?
I definitely recommend trying things out before committing to anything - just because it works for someone else doesn't mean it will work for you. But also if you're in this community and you're reading this, you're creative, so don't be afraid to let what you're feeling fuel some of your art. Even if it never sees the light of day. I find it's that freedom to feel and exist so wholely and completely that it often makes me feel my best at the end of the day.
There is a strange pressure to share everything you write, but you are right; art can be purely for ourselves. This reminds me of how you don't edit your poems. Is this so they keep the rawest qualities, and how much of your writing is put out?
That's true I don't really like to edit my poems because the more I think about them, the less authentic they become and also, I feel like if a poem is too polished, it doesn't really help anyone it doesn't do what I am aiming for my work to accomplish. There are poets who create fantastic polished pieces, and that works well for them, but their goals I think, are very different from my own. As for how much of what I write is actually shared, let's put it this way I go through 82 Moleskine journals a year (before I switched to an iPad), and while I do try to share a few pieces a week across all my platforms and I'm pretty on track for a full collection a year and a chapbook a year, there's still so much that either hasnt been shared yet or simply won't be.
Are you in the poetry club ‘IF I DON’T WRITE I WILL EXPLODE?’
I don't know if I'd put it like that, but I do ALWAYS have things I want to write and ideas I want to play with. And if I don't at least get it onto a page or a note or whatever, I genuinely mourn the life it could have had. Dramatic, I know, but who isn't from time to time?
I think that is a poet trait for sure. Do you have anything else you'd like to share or say to anybody reading this?
Just thank you so much for your time, and if you're reading this you're likely human you're bound to be anxious or worried or maybe even terrified from time to time but you're not alone and I for one am here for you.
Thank you so much. It has been a joy having you.
Thank you for having me!
You can find Madison Rene on Instagram and find out about everything she has going on by clicking here.